a war hero

Tuesday I was blown away as I sat in Joanne's office surrounded by a room full of strangers minus my two moms and Kevin. Kevin spoke to the class of interns about his time in the military and lessons learned. I knew that whatever he was going to say would be powerful and well received. I had no idea how much it would effect me. He spoke of being lost and found, of being a man of 19 and being a world away from home, of being shot and of how unpopular the Vietnam war in which he served was among the Americans. It broke my heart to hear how after he had been in the hospital and had numerous surgeries, he was then spat on when he returned home. I cannot imagine all of the hardships endured by the veterans of this country. I sometimes feel like the sister in The Secret Lives of Bees that feels everyones pain/sorrow and becomes absolutely overcome by emotion and cannot stop crying. I was moved and did not feel worthy to be in the presence of a man that had laid down his life so unselfishly and responsibly to fight for his country. That does not feel untitled to anything. That is proud and would never consider himself a hero of any type. And yet every single person in that room, from the man next to me that was practically sobbing when Kevin recounted details of his service to the heads of the program would indeed call him that as would so many others. I hope to show my gratefulness in ways that I have not done in the past. I want to say thank you and I am sorry.

nanny diaries

Wow. I really am not sure how parents do it. I am exhausted, worn down and haven't even had the chance to shower today. Arrived to casa morgan e carter last night and had no idea what I was in for. Cutest kids ever for sure. This morning started with syrup with a side of waffles and playing texting with miss morgan. We soon headed out (picture me driving a mini van and punky brewster playing on the dvd player) for whatever the day was going to hold. The library was first - I was most definitely the one that people were probably glaring at like shhhhhhhhhh. But the kids had a great time picking out books and dvds and then doing the self check out (mad skills like their aunt). We then headed to Wheaton Regional for a carousel ride and train ride followed by some playground time. (note to self, when you tell a two year old to wait right there while you take his older sister down the slide first, he is not inclined to listen hence the petrified look on his face as he comes barreling down right after you). Intentions were Five Guys but ended up at McDonald's instead. Nap time was so not happening this afternoon after C finagled his way out of his diaper while in his crib and I stood there like - why don't they ever teach you in school what to do in a situation like this. I had visions of having to call the police department after the door to Morgans room was locked with both kids inside and me panicky on the outside. Before I knew it and after our version of kareoke that I will again be partaking in tomorrow since it was a big hit, it was time for dinner. I could have jumped up and down when M said she wanted something as simple as pasta - love her. C was done by the time we sat down to eat but my timing with cooking has never been a strong suit. Bath time went over fairly well and now I am thinking of all that somehow didn't get done today and taking full advantage of watching the lady gaga special that I know would never fly when there are interesting shows like spongebob on...Happy to report that both kids went down for the night pretty easily since they were exhausted. I just love how he puts his head on my shoulder and how she fell asleep laying against me on the couch. Makes everything all worth it. They are my headstrong, super sweet peeps and we are almost all ready to do it again tomorrow - but first...much needed sleep....

what I learned from my time in Europe

Just a few things that I discovered along the way...

-People all over the world are friendly, will go out of their way for a stranger and want you to love their country

-Why not is often a good response

-I can live without a cell phone, my mac and tv for months and feel like I am a better person because of it

-Nothing feels like a shower

-American music is listened to everywhere

-Do not hold a cup of hot tea between your legs (especially in a moving vehicle)

-Planes get you there faster but you miss the scenery and hours of reflection provided by trains

-There is nothing like family - regardless of how you are related or how long you have known each other

-Coffee is meant to be enjoyed slowly savoring each sip while sitting (no take away)

-Czech beer is unlike any other (in fact, non-alcoholic czech beer tastes better than any american beer according to my cousin)

-Shoes should not be worn on yachts

-Amazing people will fly all over and buy $$ tickets to travel with me - I am a lucky girl

-Euros, francs and kronas go quickly!

-The world is a huge playground that I have only scratched the surface of

-I am not above miming to communicate

-Sometimes hotels, food and views are worth splurging on

-Driving on the other side of the road is not horribly difficult (especially when it is 4 am and there are no other cars on the road)

-there is a difference between the Queen's English and the English we speak

-Ask how much things such as brunch at the Ritz and beers in Italia are before partaking

-there are all kinds of things you can do with potatoes (even on the same plate 4 different ways!)

-cheers on the bottom of a glass not to pass the plague

-I can still pass as a student

-As Americans we are lucky for many reasons: we can go wherever we want, vote for whoever we want, etc. but we lack the traditions, history and culture of other countries

-A simple life is appealing

-Patience and positivity go a long way

-Everyone has a story

-I am comfortable not knowing what is being said around me

-Everything happens for a reason

-As a country, we have much to learn

-Thank you sounds similar in many languages. Tone says a lot

-Never judge a book by its cover

vagabonding

I've been giving some serious thought to another trip in the next few months. Right now Asia is top of mind. Bubi thinks I should go to China - and that pretty much sealed the deal. I know someone that recently moved to Hong Kong and have friends of friends in China. I know nothing about their currency, language or customs but feel that I am ready to dive in head first. I have not yet looked into flights or anything having to do with pricing for that matter as I know it will scare me but I do find myself dreaming about my next adventure.

Vagabonding is a book that spoke to me from a library shelf and I just started reading. The concept is enticing and overwhelming but I want to find out more and see what I can learn. An uncommon guide to the art of long-term world travel - sign me up!

'Research your own experiences for the truth...Absorb what is useful...Add what is specifically your own...The creating individual is more than any style or system' Bruce Lee

the eastern shore

This morning I was brought back to another time and place - it was 12 years ago and just before the shore was filled with people, I pulled down 142nd street in Ocean City and plopped myself on the beach. Feet in sand, book in hand, the sounds and smells the same as it was a dozen years ago when I was an OCMD local and life was simpler. It wasn't long that I sat there absorbing all that was going on around me and zoning out at the same time- but it was glorious. I wished that I had more time and hope to plan a few days down there before fall. I am so glad that Kendall got to experience a summer in oc - what great friends I made and memories I have of nights out, sun-filled days and never being bored for three summers when things weren't necessarily perfect but they were pretty fantastic. Of course there was also smelling like a mixture of crabs, old bay and grease and no air-conditioning but I would do it all over again if given the chance.

Today was Bobbie's service. It was wonderful to see everyone and my heart goes out to their whole family. It still doesn't feel real.

After the burial we drove by the University which I have not done for years. It was a strange feeling like not much time had gone by and yet it was ten years ago that I graduated. There are things that I miss about eastern shore living but I think at the end of the day - I am a city girl at heart. At least for now :)

lost and found

There are people that come and go in life that make an impact - regardless of when you saw them last. Yesterday the world lost one of those people. Bobbie was a unique and vivacious soul who always spoke her mind and made you feel at home. I will never forget how wonderful she was to me in all the summers that I spent in Salisbury and while I was in college. I was intrigued with her ever since I can remember - and she is responsible for some people that are so dear to me - Lynn, David and Jamie. I will always remember her frankness and sense of humor. We are headed down to the eastern shore on Sunday to attend her service on Monday. I was emotional this morning emailing with Jame feeling their loss and being brought back to the place that I was years ago when Mom-mom died. Grieving is such a hard thing to do and holes that are left from those that have departed are never quite filled.

I was thrilled last week to receive an email from Tara (a good friend from college that I had lost touch with these past few years). Thanks to Linked In she was able to track me down and seeing her name in my inbox made me so happy. We exchanged a few emails trying to catch each other up on the past 5 years or so and met this afternoon! Of course she hasn't changed at all - circumstances have for both of us and we tried to cram as much into a few hours as we could. We are in two totally different places in our lives but are very much alike in some ways. I am so glad that we reconnected and look forward to the next time we get together.

'there came a moment in the middle of the song when she suddenly felt every heartbeat in the room & after that she never forgot she was part of something much bigger'

my need to write

I have received several journals as gifts lately. I have had a number of conversations with people that are much wiser than I am and whose opinions and words mean much to me. It is all pointing in the same direction - I need to write. I should write. And yet this huge desire and the gift of time that I now have to indulge also overwhelms and scares me. After all, what in the world would I write about? I have many stories and thoughts bottled up and truly do not know where to start. I want to write children’s books and I want to write about my life. I want to write love stories and about finding oneself. I want to write short stories and I want to write a novel. I want to write about those that I know well and about strangers. I don’t know where to start and who will listen. I love pouring my heart out in my journal (93 pages written while I was in Europe!) but sometimes I feel like I have nothing good to write about in my blog. How can a writer have nothing to write about? To not know what to say? That doesn’t make any sense to me.

I am adjusting to being back - not sure if I am adjusting well or just going through motions that make it seem like I am settling into my new east coast living. I am surprised how much I miss my traveling lifestyle. I don’t think that is my last trip this year - at least I hope that it is not but unfortunately, I need to look at my finances and see what is realistic and what I can actually afford. I have a strong desire to go to Asia and continue my Eat, Roots, Love trip - we will see how it all shakes out and what is in the cards for me these next few weeks/months. I never realized that I say we’ll see as often as I apparently do until Kristen pointed it out somewhere between Spain and Portugal and now I am much more conscious of it. Of course I also noticed how much my dad says it when we were on our cruise - I guess that is where I get it from.

Congrats to Mom and Kevin!

Big news: Mom and Kevin are engaged! I flew back from my European adventure on Thursday - it was an all day affair mostly because there was a 4 hour delay from Newark to Dulles - so close but so far. Dad picked me up and we went over to Tiffany’s where Joanne, Kristen, Tiffany, Chris, Kevin, Ryan, Morgan and Carter were. It was so good to see everyone! I was tired but excited to be around my people. Friday I was pretty much a waste of space - so out of it. Woke up way too early, had breakfast with Dad and uploaded all of my photos (not exactly sure how many but my guess is about 2,000). I went to have a much needed pedicure and then mom and Kendall picked me up and we went to Chrissy’s to have lunch and catch up. Then I learned that Kevin had designed a ring for mom and it was going to soon be ready. I crashed early that night and mom and I ran errands the next morning before I headed down to DC to see Kristen. Zach’s birthday party was at his grandparents house in Silver Spring yesterday afternoon. I was the first one of our crew there and it was great to see VZD and meet some of the other side of the family. Mom and Kevin came in with Kendall a little while later and were bursting with happiness. I could tell that something was up :) After greeting everyone, mom showed us girls the ring...it is stunning. Then Kevin told Kara and I the story of how he wanted to do it on Friday night but the jeweler wouldn’t have it ready until Saturday. He pulled a letter out that he wrote to mom and had given her earlier that day and read it to us - he started crying when he read it, we started getting teary eyed. How exciting and wonderful for them! I love how our family is growing. The rest of the day was great - and right now Brian, Kara, Mom, Chrissy, Kendall, Lulu and I are all piled in the car on our way down to the Outer Banks for a few days of sun, sand, bbq and good times. I am so happy!